"don't try to straighten it"

One of my favourite quotes from Susan Scott "Life is curly, Don't try to straighten it" was originally meant for organisational contexts. But a decade of academia, 15 years of therapeutic work, 8 years of motherhood, 2 marriages, 3 children and 35 years of life, have led me to conclude that it is all one big frizzy curly life.

What's more, everyone has a curly life, even if they don't want to admit it. We all have curly days; where no matter what you do you can't smooth the bumps or preempt the wonky bits. We all have curly families; some (like my own) that resemble corkscrews at times - with the ups and downs and roundabouts that come from being in relationship with others. We have curly relationships; at work, with friends, with partners. We even have curly habits, curly thoughts, curly dreams and curly pasts.

But we also spend an inordinate amount of time trying to straighten out the frizzy bits. I went through a phase of using the hot-iron daily to flatten out my hair. I could never quite get that salon sleek look, but I would spend 30 minutes per morning, with the GHD attempting to rid my reflection of any hint of a wave or kink. Why? As a kid I had embraced my curly hair just I embraced my curly life, hell I even enhanced it with a 'crimper' (it was the 80s), then a spiral perm (it was the 90's). Then I hit University and entered some kind of parallel universe where things needed to be organised and neat and straight. Just as I chemically straightened my hair, I applied this approach to everything. But guess what...You can not 'flat iron' life. Life has a way of throwing curve balls or zigging when you expect it to zag. And so among many unexpected twists I became a Psychologist. A profession which is immersed in the curliness of human thoughts, feelings and behaviour. I also became a mother, then a wife, ex-wife, wife again, and mother to two more beautiful little people. I've been touched by grief and loss, by love and fortune, by friendship and adversity. As I'm sure you have been. Because life is curly...and I'm glad.