So this morning over coffee with my gorgeous 'grandfather-in-law' I was reminded that life is such a precious gift. Every day is of value and we shouldn't waste them. I don't mean that to sound cliche. Here's what happened.
I was breastfeeding my daughter and chatting with my husband's 89-year old grandfather. My son was playing on the swings with my MIL and "grads" and I were just shooting the breeze. We were chatting about my 5 1/2 hour drive in the car yesterday to visit my hubby's family, while he's working this week. We try to visit a few times a year. The distance is always irritating but we do it when we can. I was regailing him with the challenges of long car rides with a toddler and a baby and the stop at the weird drop toilet which required nursing bub and wrangling toddles while trying to keep balance, breastfeeding at the emergency only stopping spot on the side of the highway and wondering if a screaming 5month old classified as an "emergency", and the ice cream bribe to stop toddler attempting to scream louder than his sister and so on. Grads sympathetically listened and chuckled at my expense and then our conversation turned to his love of roller skating. I love how that random Segway happens. I had never heard this so was soaking up a new set of stories.
He was telling me about how he loved it as a teenager and a young man in England. How when he moved to Australia he was delighted when a Roller Rink opened up just down the road and how he loved that a live orchestra used to play in the centre of the rink and he'd spend hours skating around. He said others would figure skate to the music, but he delighted in going as fast as he could around the outside. He gave up skating for many years and then in his late 50s he saw an add for a new rink opening in his area and called in hired some skates and gave it a go. He said he felt like a kid again frustrated and awkward but in just an hour was crisscrossing around with all the 'young ones'. He said it re-ignited an old joy and over the years that followed he went skating numerous times. Only just last month he decided he may not get back on them - he's 89. He took them to the local op shop and they said we don't have much call for rollerskates - no one will want them. My heart sank. "They were proper skates love, attached to boots you know?" Here's my gorgeous Grads nearly 90 and he's only just parted with his skates.
We then moved to talking about his 90th birthday approaching and he mentions he hopes he'll be here to celebrate it with us. He's spritely and in very good health for his age, so the comment at first seems misplaced. To me. It's only 5 months away I think - of course he'll be here. Then I reflect that it must look different to him. We take for granted that we'll all be here in 5 months time. We put things off 6 months or a year without a second thought. We deliberate for a few weeks or procrastinate for a few months and it seems like no big deal in our 30s. Then I look down at my daughter. she's 5 months today! Where has that time gone. She was only born yesterday wasn't she? Now she's rolling and giggling and trying to sit by herself. She's pulling her knees beneath her and pushing her brother away when he blows raspberries on her tummy. It then strikes me hard. In 5 months my daughter has lived her whole lifetime and 5 more months seems like a fragile gift to Grads, one that will see him reach 90 years of age. What is 5months really? What will I do in 5 months? What could I do?
Time is such a funny thing. It does seem to speed up as we get older. But it doesn't. It's just perspective. To me, my daughter and to Grads, it's all the same in reality. A day is a day. How we use it is what makes the difference. Whether it's learning to crawl, skating as fast as we can or making the effort to visit loved ones far away- its a day. We have traded 24 life hours for today. Have we made the most of them? I want to be like my daughter and see each day as a new adventure and an opportunity to learn, but I also want to be like my grads and treat each day as a precious gift which I'm grateful for and where I can spend time in reflection with those i love and eat choc chip cookies without guilt (which I did with his encouragement). Because tnis curly thing called time will never be slowed, it keeps on moving and all we know is we have right now. So eat the cookie, play on the swings instead of watching. Learn something new. Visit someone far away. Celebrate today. And don't hang up your rollerskates until you want to.
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